We are going to have a baby. I am 10 1/2 weeks right now. It
feels like it has been a lot longer because I knew the very second that it
happened. Believe me when I say, that moment was sincere and beautiful. To
associate it with the baby’s life will be 'our' blessing in itself, I know this.
We waited until the last week of the month to walk over to the local store together to buy a
pregnancy test. We figured that the hormone level would be best to test after I
was technically "late," even though deep down we knew. The directions on the box were
in Spanish, so I told him “you will have to read this for me.”
We woke up the next day at 4:30am for him to go to work. He
opened the box the night before and put everything upstairs in the bathroom for
me, ready to go. In the morning I went up and did the urine test. I brought it
down to him while he stood in the kitchen brushing his teeth. He looked
at it, looked at the paper, looked at me and said with his sexy foreign accent,
“baby you’re pregnant.” We just held each other laughing.
We have always talked about having one more, but not until
the papers were finished and that way I could rest and he could work. Stupid
papers…. We never dreamed it would have taken this long and now I have aged a
bit. When we first made the decision to separate and I take the kids to live in
the USA from Mexico, we figured a 3-6 month separation tops, as that was what everyone told us.
We had no idea it would have ever been like this. I doubt we would have gone forward
with the plan knowing that a year and a half later there is still nothing, no
light at the end of the tunnel, no date given. We would have never had the
balls, never… if we knew what the last year and a half entailed… we would not
have had the balls to proceed.
Yet here we are finding ourselves back to the start, only
with more knowledge on the subject of immigration. We now are aware of how we
are able to retrieve the blessed legal status papers for my husband, to let our
children be raised by their willing father, but most importantly, to start a
normal stable life in a home that we sink our love and time into filling with
smiles and love and warmth… one home that does not entail suitcases, passports,
and time limits to squeeze everything in till next time… and the tears of
separation.
However, we may have to give up that goal and return to Mexico this June for good, after all that.
The next few weeks will entail many tests for the baby that
I carry to see how the factors of my high risk age pan out. We most certainly
do not want to go in on the blind to deliver a baby in a dark room in Mexico
until I know that everything is fine. I am sure that he/she is, but it is nice
to be prepared.
That is where we are right now.
Congratulations!!
ReplyDelete